17 August 2014

Today is the seventh anniversary of Ruth’s passing.

I’ve flown back to Virginia to honor the date in my usual manner by visiting with her at the University Cemetery in Charlottesville. I believe I’m now more familiar with this section of The Grounds than any single other. Until the move to California I’d been in habit of visiting several times a year. I had thought from time to time about moving to C’ville just to be closer to the site. I suppose there are other reasons not the least of which the affinity with the area in general and the University in particular but the more I pondered the possibility the more it seemed a poor idea.

Dealing with memories is an uneasy task for me. By nature I’m inclined toward the past, nostalgic bordering on melancholy. The characteristic has it’s advantages, especially for someone who, Continue reading


I am truly grateful for the life that’s somehow come my way over the past couple of years. Eighteen years ago everything seemed to have come to a standstill. And then Ruth put it all in motion again.

Six years ago Ruth was sucked into a cancer vortex from which none of us could retrieve her and once again life lost its meaning.

It took more than a little help from quite a few old friends and not a few new ones to get me off that ledge. But they did. I did. We did.

Since then its all been unexplainable to me. It hasn’t been pain free. Life just isn’t like that. But the good has outweighed the bad by a lot and just seems to continue to gain the edge. If I believed in miracles that’s what I’d call it. But I don’t. I only rely in them.

I’m on the verge of relocating from my lifelong home in Virginia – if you’re outside the US, Google it – to newfound territory in California. People ask me if I won’t miss all those longstanding connections. I’ve given that some thought and come to the conclusion that with today’s technology the only way to lose a connection is to deliberately abandon it – which I have no intention of doing. So the answer is ‘no’. They’re not disappearing – unless of course they choose to of their own accord.

There are some whose physical presence will be sorely missed. That’s been true ever since I put myself out here on the road. But somehow we manage to reconnect and I don’t see that ending anytime soon.

And then there are the new west coast friends who’ve been added in the mix. I can’t underestimate their importance either. And all the people in between in LA, KY, TX, AR, NC, NJ, NY, NM, OH, WA, GA, and FL. ( I just know I’ve left someone’s place off that list. Argh!)

When I add them all up I’m simply overwhelmed by how blessed I am to have them in my life. I am in a word, humbled.

I doubt I’ll ever be in a position to repay the kindness I’ve been shown by the people who surround my life and hold me close within its bounds but I’m determined to try. Life for me now is defined simply as doing the next right thing. It’s not a precept with which I have a tremendous amount of experience. But I’m trying.

I look forward to getting back to the east coast in a couple of weeks. To renewing old friendships on a face to face basis and perhaps establishing a few new ones. These connections and more sustain me on this journey – to where I’m not sure. I’m just grateful I’m allowed to take it.